When I was a kid and did something wrong, I would proclaim my innocence and my mom would tell me rather jokingly (since I was a only kid):
I know. It was your evil twin brother that did it.
I decided since then I wanted to have an evil twin brother inside my skin. A person that could get away with things, say things, do things and I could proclaim my innocence with the same claim that my mom used years before.
Now I feel empowered to perhaps tell certain people that I think they are no account shitheads and the only idea they ever had died of loneliness. Then I can blame it on my evil twin. But instead of it being some real twin, its my evil schizoid twin that lives deep within and does these things I am normally ashamed of.
Every so often he comes out and does something good and all his so-called friends will comment,
That was so good. What the hell is the matter with you?
Then he will say, before I take over the real estate, that it was his good twin brother that did the deed.
So lets see if you can guess if its me or my horrible twin saying these things. No clues. Just see how far you can get?
- I don’t much care for most people and some people I even care less for.
- Don’t ask to borrow crap from me. Loaning things causes amnesia.
- I’m selfish, narcissistic and asocial and those are my best qualities so “f” off.
- There is no question that is stupid besides a stupid question. Just forget about it.
- I may say things I don’t mean but I never mean things I don’t say (go figure that one out).
- I lie sometimes for no good or bad reason.
So my life is some horrible twist of me and my bro. He takes over at inopportune moments like when my ex-wife asks me something stupid. Then I bite my tongue figuratively of course and try to take back over from that evil one. It don’t work all the time.
When I write this blog, its a battle. Evil and good trying to vie for position on the written page. Of course this is all BS or I can easily say its because I am human. Human of course. So I lie, cheat and steal. I do stupid things for the best of reasons and say things which I may be sorry for at some later date or not.
Its all confusing except to me. I blame it all on my brother. Either the evil or good one.