Every so often I type in some search word to see what accumulated BS and/or wisdom this blog has perpetuated. Some of the posts seem almost intelligent and articulate and philosophical and others seem like the rambling of a somewhat mad guy. From about 2009 to 2014 I lived in a house where the fractured family held court. My kids came and went and my ex-wife mostly went. The blog chronicles those years pretty well if not angrily in some posts. I have had conflicting feelings about some of the posts but its dawned on me that I went through the stages that people say and I wrote about a lot of it on this here blog.
From being an archeologist to doing project management. Finding okay jobs and then accepting jobs I now wonder whatever prompted me to take. They were all grist for some mill where I tested and tasted the waters of existence. The blog chronicles some years with sets of things called categories divided into months and years called archives. Its all there.
The life of Mike is all there. Divided up and roughly defined by topics and posts and subjects and searchable data. WordPress maintains this all so well for me. I can “find” and I can search and I can write into a mysql database out there in a VPS I own. Its all a thread of an existence which still moves onward.
I watch friends, and I have a few, do their things. Some people could call me a friend but I doubt that they satisfy my somewhat demanding and demented criteria of friendship. For those people, they are something else. They cannot cross the Rubicon of my relationship requirements so I have let them go, they have let me go, or both have happened.
All of the places I’ve worked, the two kids I’ve had, the ex-wife that seems to still want to order me about. Its all in the blog. Its like a vicarious measuring stick of my life since about 2005. Some things went missing like an entire month in 2009 when I was in India working. Some pictures were not kept as I moved things around here and there. Such is life though folks. We all lose those precious photographs and then going through a box we happen across them.
I’ll take my daughter force to see a person she happens to admire and love and I’m glad she does. RWR is getting older and we shall travel to the Antelope Valley to see him. The same valley that took me to isolated canyons and fields of wild flowers, and prehistoric archeological sites perched in wondrous ecologies. The memories still abound and I write these things down not for future posterity but so in another year when I am doing whatever I shall be doing then, I can run yet another search and I will find this. This post is nothing special but a mile marker in a life beset by calamities and happenstance.
Rarely are all the orbits in perfect pitch good friend “D”. Never assume they are or as someone said,
when you assume you make an ass out of u and me
And this blog will continue I am gathering and not be erased any time soon. It catches the crumbs of an existence that sometimes I was bewildered by, sometimes I hated, and sometimes had stages to go through to get to the other side.
I’ll select enough categories to find this retrospective again. Mikes Thoughts is just that. If you happen to read here perhaps you only come back once and figure out that the whole blogging thing may be moving a bit slower. There are those of us who maintain them and update them and have love/hate relationships with them. We stop and we are 5 pound chickens trying to lay 10 pound eggs. A terribly constipated feeling results and life seems less.
Don’t refer here looking for answers to your own stages for I have none. Instead I’ll go out and walk soon at Irvington Park and wonder and wander down streets and see tree lined blocked with kids playing and dogs barking. I won’t know and I won’t care.